So I bought a rotisserie chicken the other day, took it home and started slicing it up. For probably as long as I live, rotisserie chicken will make me think of my friend, BM4. I refer to him that way so as not to put his business out in the street; most of the people who know the both of us will know him by that code, as it was his 3-character work email address.
Anyway. BM4 and his family (his now-wife, his brother and his sister-in-law) have always been there for me whenever I was sick. Many years ago I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I had a number of surgeries. When you get out of surgery, the hospital generally won't release you unless you have someone to pick you up. For a single person with no significant other and no relatives in the City, this becomes a bit of a hassle. I had like 5 surgeries. There's a limit to the number of times I'm willing to ask my friends to take off work to come pick me up and take me home. Not that they'd not be willing to do it, just that I really don't consider it necessary and would prefer to save my favors for when I actually needed something.
But my friends are great. I remember one of the surgeries, BM4 and E were there to meet me in the recovery area. This was with a doctor who didn't give you the scrip for pain meds until after the actual surgery (my last doctor gave me the scrip beforehand so I could get it filled and wouldn't have to be running around after the surgery). So I'm all out of my head after anesthesia and have this prescription that has to be filled. Not sure exactly how it worked, but BM4 volunteered to do it and went out and came back with my scrip. Very nicely done!
Then he and his wife took me home. They are just really sweet people, and I think they were concerned about whether I had enough to eat or something. So we stopped and got me rotisserie chicken and salad. In the days to come, when I was too weak or too drugged up (or too uncomfortable with the maiming surgery I'd just had) to go out of the house, I found myself incredibly grateful to BM4 and his wife for that rotisserie chicken and salad. So much so, that every time I eat rotisserie chicken, I think of him.
That's not all the story, of course. His brother stopped by just to visit. I mean, his BROTHER. We know each other, but we're not super close. But he was in the neighborhood, and gave me a call to see if I felt like a visitor. He stopped in and chatted. The brother's wife (BM4's sister-in-law) did the same thing. It's just soooo sweet to have friends like that. I probably never directly thanked them, but their sweetness, kindness, and graciousness made an indelible impression on me. It's a blessing to have wonderful people in your life!
So more on BM4: this is a guy who, after graduating high school, worked a variety of jobs, including NYC cab driver and warehouse stocker. He was working in a Barnes and Noble warehouse and started reading books on computers. Which led to him getting a job as a computer technician in a law firm (which is where both I and his present wife met him). He continued to study and was promoted up the ranks until he became the Manager of the entire IT department (after having been the whole Network Manager -- two completely different skillsets, by the way). As he made his way up the corporate IT ladder, he continued to study and to avail himself of new technologies. Long story short, he and his wife and two kids are living the suburban dream in a lovely house with a big fireplace in Connecticut. They don't work outside the house -- he's created some kind of internet something that allows him to support his family very nicely, AND he sends me emails from time to time of special moments shared with his children as they're growing up.
I wanted to say something about how he is like the perfect black man -- we always tease him about his traits that are like a brother. Except he's not a black man. And being a product of NYC, he has the most interesting and varied group of friends -- going to his house is like going to a little UN! And he's a fount of information regarding people and cultures. He'd probably be a great guy with whom to play Trivial Pursuit....
It just doesn't get any better than that, IMHO. I don't believe BM4 and his wife have an active church life, but I have spoken to her about their spiritual journey. What I see is that their faith walk is expressed in their dealings with their fellow human beings, and that's exemplary. And they have their oldest child in Catholic school, so he's probably doing enough of the organized religion stuff for everyone!
They're a wonderful family, I'm delighted to call them friends, and now that I have a car, I can't wait to take a drive up to CT and visit them! Life's good; BM4 and rotisserie chicken make it even better.
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Skydiving and autos
So last week I turned 55. To celebrate, I went skydiving. You can see the video here: I can see this becoming an annual thing....
Also, the agency bought a car, of which I have exclusive use. It's a 2010 Nissan Altima Hybrid. It's been a couple of weeks, and already I'm questioning the wisdom of having a car in NYC. We paid for it outright, but the Agency pays over $100 per month to keep it parked during the day, and I personally pay nearly $200 per month to park it at my house. Yes, I could park it on the street, but already my life and schedule are impacted by "will I find parking when I get home?" -- it's just simpler to pay for parking.
And it's a hybrid. And it's a push to start. And there's only one key. So yesterday I left work because I had a dentist's appointment. I "rushed" home as much as I could in the rain and the insanity that is NYC traffic. The trip from home to work shouldn't take more than 10 minutes in a car. It took me nearly 30 minutes yesterday, mostly because people are just stupid.
So I get home and find a great space in front of the house. I cut off the windshield wipers and turn off the radio, then rush inside to pick up my cable box and umbrella. Head downtown. First I go to my dentist's office, and he makes my new bridge fit perfectly. Then I come up to 96th street and return my cable box and modem (I just went FiOS). And then I headed back down to Penn Station to go to the Liberty game.
About halftime, I get a call on my cell. It was my super. "You know," he tells me, "that you left your car on." No, I didn't know, and I was a good 45 minutes away in Jersey. He told me I had a quarter tank (I'd had less than half a tank when I turned on the car at 2-something -- I wanted to see how much of the month I could make it through on yhalf a tank of gas.
Long story short: when I got home a bit after 11, the car was still running, and still had a quarter tank of gas! Guess this whole turning-off-the-car-that-doesn't make-you-have-a-key-in-hand thing is going to take a bit of adjustment. Since you need to have the key within 30 inches to start the car, I would have thought it would have cut off if the key went more than 30 inches away from it. But that wasn't the case....
So I still have more to learn.
But the skydiving was fun!
Also, the agency bought a car, of which I have exclusive use. It's a 2010 Nissan Altima Hybrid. It's been a couple of weeks, and already I'm questioning the wisdom of having a car in NYC. We paid for it outright, but the Agency pays over $100 per month to keep it parked during the day, and I personally pay nearly $200 per month to park it at my house. Yes, I could park it on the street, but already my life and schedule are impacted by "will I find parking when I get home?" -- it's just simpler to pay for parking.
And it's a hybrid. And it's a push to start. And there's only one key. So yesterday I left work because I had a dentist's appointment. I "rushed" home as much as I could in the rain and the insanity that is NYC traffic. The trip from home to work shouldn't take more than 10 minutes in a car. It took me nearly 30 minutes yesterday, mostly because people are just stupid.
So I get home and find a great space in front of the house. I cut off the windshield wipers and turn off the radio, then rush inside to pick up my cable box and umbrella. Head downtown. First I go to my dentist's office, and he makes my new bridge fit perfectly. Then I come up to 96th street and return my cable box and modem (I just went FiOS). And then I headed back down to Penn Station to go to the Liberty game.
About halftime, I get a call on my cell. It was my super. "You know," he tells me, "that you left your car on." No, I didn't know, and I was a good 45 minutes away in Jersey. He told me I had a quarter tank (I'd had less than half a tank when I turned on the car at 2-something -- I wanted to see how much of the month I could make it through on yhalf a tank of gas.
Long story short: when I got home a bit after 11, the car was still running, and still had a quarter tank of gas! Guess this whole turning-off-the-car-that-doesn't make-you-have-a-key-in-hand thing is going to take a bit of adjustment. Since you need to have the key within 30 inches to start the car, I would have thought it would have cut off if the key went more than 30 inches away from it. But that wasn't the case....
So I still have more to learn.
But the skydiving was fun!
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Freedom and Independence
It occurs to me that our legal and judicial system foster neither individual freedom nor independence. I tell this everywhere I go, and may have posted it here, but I'm going to tell the story about wild pigs.
How do you catch a wild pig? First, you find a clearing in the woods, and then you put food on the ground. The pigs find it and soon they will keep coming back for it. When they are used to coming every day, you put a fence down one side of the place where they are used to coming. When they get used to the fence, they keep eating the free food. Then you put up another side of the fence. They get used to that and keep eating.
Then you put a third side up. The pigs keep coming. Finally, when you have them comfortably inside eating free food, you nail up the fourth side of the fence. You've caught them. The wild pigs have lost their freedom. They run around and around inside the fence, but they are caught.
Eventually, they go back to eating the free food. They are so used to it that they have forgotten how to forage in the woods for themselves, so they accept their captivity.
I always use this analogy when I think of people of color in the US. We have poor people here, yes, but nothing that rivals poverty I've seen in Central and South America, the Middle East, or Africa. WE GIVE FREE FOOD AND HOUSING TO PEOPLE WHO ARE PERFECTLY ABLE TO GO OUT AND WORK FOR IT!!!! The people who receive these benefits grow complacent, and think of this not as handouts, but as "entitlements." Then they become, increasingly, used to the free food, the entitlements. They sometimes spend generations trapped in the pigpen of entitlements, losing both the ability and the moral/social/ethical/practical foundation for self-reliance.
While there is an illusion of freedom and independence in this country, the reality is that as long as the government is giving people everything they need, they are destroying the natural tendency for self-reliance. In addition to making people pawns of the state (imagine living in a world where you believe your destiny is not influenced by your actions, but by the actions of an huge, impersonal, bureaucratic government. For those anti-theists, I offer that at the very least, the concept of God is personal!!!) -- but in addition to making people pawns of the state, it keeps them trapped. As we see, generations of people live like this: unempowered, helpless, hopeless, and angry at something outside themselves, never able to even conceptualize that the power comes from within. These are people more concerned with "getting something from the system" than with doing something with their lives. There is an attitude of "getting something for nothing," which is completely contrary to the attitude of working hard for the strengthening of one's character and/or for whatever joy or other benefits might be derived from the work. Our legal and judicial systems, it seems, are geared towards perpetuating this standard condition of hopeless, helpless, entitlement, and are determined not to dare risk having any of its less-than-privileged citizens run the risk of grappling unpreparedly with notions such as freedom, independence, or liberty. Those ideals don't really exist for everyone, you see -- they only exist for the privileged. Everyone else is trapped in a sort of shadow world. They don't truly have freedom or independence -- they only have some vague idea of the concept and spend their lives in a Plato's-Cave-like prison -- shackled in their pigpens, they never get to experience true freedom or independence. The most they have are shadowy projections, to which they've ascribed the forms and attributes of freedom and independence. But of course, they're only seeing distorted images, not the real things. It's impossible to experience freedom and independence when you're confined to a prison.
And so we see our urban youth imprisoned, sometimes in jails with physical bars, and sometimes in mental jails that never allow them true knowledge of freedom or independence. Because of this lack of knowledge, they are condemned to lives in which they think of themselves as less-than, lives that tell them their success is to be found on playing fields or in drug dens, but not in commerce, industry, the arts, or the humanities. (Unless, of course, you include the music industry, which increasingly perpetuates this same erroneous stereotype). And you can't blame the kids. They are being reared by parents who have no hopes or dreams, or whose hopes and dreams have been shattered and who haven't dared to hope or dream again. Where's the Freedom there? Where's the Independence there?
It's even more ironic when we consider (and I hadn't intended to write on this when I started, but it's even more ironic when we consider) that a disproportionate number of those who risk their lives fighting for our freedom are young men and women of color. Perhaps that's not the worst thing in the world. Perhaps it's not horrible for our kids to get out of an environment where they think it's ok to walk around showing their underwear and into an environment where they identify with being Army Strong, or where they'll want to be part of America's Navy, a Global Force for Good -- Around the World, Around the Clock. Perhaps it's not so bad for our kids to stop identifying with misogynistic thugs and instead identify with the USAF, whose mission is to Fly, Fight, and Win, in Air, Space,. and Cyberspace. Or maybe, just maybe, our kids will find themselves among the few, the proud, the Marines. Somehow, I think that if we embraced those ideals of the military, we might have a military that could focus on matters other than warfare.
Which would be a tremendous boost to our Freedom and Independence.
How do you catch a wild pig? First, you find a clearing in the woods, and then you put food on the ground. The pigs find it and soon they will keep coming back for it. When they are used to coming every day, you put a fence down one side of the place where they are used to coming. When they get used to the fence, they keep eating the free food. Then you put up another side of the fence. They get used to that and keep eating.
Then you put a third side up. The pigs keep coming. Finally, when you have them comfortably inside eating free food, you nail up the fourth side of the fence. You've caught them. The wild pigs have lost their freedom. They run around and around inside the fence, but they are caught.
Eventually, they go back to eating the free food. They are so used to it that they have forgotten how to forage in the woods for themselves, so they accept their captivity.
I always use this analogy when I think of people of color in the US. We have poor people here, yes, but nothing that rivals poverty I've seen in Central and South America, the Middle East, or Africa. WE GIVE FREE FOOD AND HOUSING TO PEOPLE WHO ARE PERFECTLY ABLE TO GO OUT AND WORK FOR IT!!!! The people who receive these benefits grow complacent, and think of this not as handouts, but as "entitlements." Then they become, increasingly, used to the free food, the entitlements. They sometimes spend generations trapped in the pigpen of entitlements, losing both the ability and the moral/social/ethical/practical foundation for self-reliance.
While there is an illusion of freedom and independence in this country, the reality is that as long as the government is giving people everything they need, they are destroying the natural tendency for self-reliance. In addition to making people pawns of the state (imagine living in a world where you believe your destiny is not influenced by your actions, but by the actions of an huge, impersonal, bureaucratic government. For those anti-theists, I offer that at the very least, the concept of God is personal!!!) -- but in addition to making people pawns of the state, it keeps them trapped. As we see, generations of people live like this: unempowered, helpless, hopeless, and angry at something outside themselves, never able to even conceptualize that the power comes from within. These are people more concerned with "getting something from the system" than with doing something with their lives. There is an attitude of "getting something for nothing," which is completely contrary to the attitude of working hard for the strengthening of one's character and/or for whatever joy or other benefits might be derived from the work. Our legal and judicial systems, it seems, are geared towards perpetuating this standard condition of hopeless, helpless, entitlement, and are determined not to dare risk having any of its less-than-privileged citizens run the risk of grappling unpreparedly with notions such as freedom, independence, or liberty. Those ideals don't really exist for everyone, you see -- they only exist for the privileged. Everyone else is trapped in a sort of shadow world. They don't truly have freedom or independence -- they only have some vague idea of the concept and spend their lives in a Plato's-Cave-like prison -- shackled in their pigpens, they never get to experience true freedom or independence. The most they have are shadowy projections, to which they've ascribed the forms and attributes of freedom and independence. But of course, they're only seeing distorted images, not the real things. It's impossible to experience freedom and independence when you're confined to a prison.
And so we see our urban youth imprisoned, sometimes in jails with physical bars, and sometimes in mental jails that never allow them true knowledge of freedom or independence. Because of this lack of knowledge, they are condemned to lives in which they think of themselves as less-than, lives that tell them their success is to be found on playing fields or in drug dens, but not in commerce, industry, the arts, or the humanities. (Unless, of course, you include the music industry, which increasingly perpetuates this same erroneous stereotype). And you can't blame the kids. They are being reared by parents who have no hopes or dreams, or whose hopes and dreams have been shattered and who haven't dared to hope or dream again. Where's the Freedom there? Where's the Independence there?
It's even more ironic when we consider (and I hadn't intended to write on this when I started, but it's even more ironic when we consider) that a disproportionate number of those who risk their lives fighting for our freedom are young men and women of color. Perhaps that's not the worst thing in the world. Perhaps it's not horrible for our kids to get out of an environment where they think it's ok to walk around showing their underwear and into an environment where they identify with being Army Strong, or where they'll want to be part of America's Navy, a Global Force for Good -- Around the World, Around the Clock. Perhaps it's not so bad for our kids to stop identifying with misogynistic thugs and instead identify with the USAF, whose mission is to Fly, Fight, and Win, in Air, Space,. and Cyberspace. Or maybe, just maybe, our kids will find themselves among the few, the proud, the Marines. Somehow, I think that if we embraced those ideals of the military, we might have a military that could focus on matters other than warfare.
Which would be a tremendous boost to our Freedom and Independence.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Boost Mobile and Virgin Mobile spout Racism and Mysogyny
This morning I got off the train at the 149th Street/Third Avenue stop in the Bronx. While awaiting the bus, I was aurally accosted by an antisocial vitriolic stream of putrid rubbish. In the midst of being offended, it occurred to me that perhaps we have been overzealous in the extension or application of our First Amendment rights if this sort of drivel is allowed to be broadcast publicly.
It was directly across the street from the bus stop. The music was so loud I had no choice but to listen to this litany of f-bombs and the n-word, and women being called the b-word, and talk of guns and violence. They were blaring from a store with a huge orange-on-black Boost Mobile sign, and underneath, two smaller signs, one reading Boost Mobile and one reading Virgin Mobile.
Of course it occurs to me that Boost and Virgin likely know very little of this one storeowner's actions. But I have to tell you that my visceral response to hearing this trash was "I will never do business with Boost Mobile or Vigin Mobile." I realize that I should have crossed the street to let the shopkeeper know I found his music offensive. And I think I've spoken in the past about how abhorrent it is that we live in a society where use of the b-word, the n-word and the f-word are considered normative.
How do we change that? One of the most effective change motivators I know of is money. And even though Boost and Virgin both cater to the same crowd that's likely not to have very much money and is also likely to tolerate such verbal assaults (or worse yet, consider them normative), I need to speak out on it.
We desperately need work in our communities -- transformative work, so that our young people understand the consequences of their behaviors. We need to transform the collective self-esteem of those who live in economically, socially, or otherwise-challenged individuals. You may not have money, you may not have status, you may not have material things, but there is an innate sense of worth, pride, and value that I just don't see in our youth. I see a cavalier attitude about life (more intense than the normal arrogance of youth), and a lack of knowledge of their own personal power. It's as if poor black and brown kids believe the hype -- they actually believe the deck is stacked against them, that they'll never amount to anything, and it's fruitless to have goals for anything other than sports or selling drugs.
I think this has come about because of generations of babies raising babies, none of whom have been instilled with adequate parenting skills or knowledge of their connection to Divinity. Quite frankly, I think that once we took God out of the ghetto, we opened the door for satan to come in, and he is roaming about like a hungry lion, seeking whom to devour. We (collectively, as a people) have no armor or defenses against him because we have no knowledge of our spiritual roots.
So we let companies like Boost Mobile and Virgin Mobile come into our communities. We allow them to rob our pockets and assault our ears with racist, mysogynistic vitriol. And we keep coming back.
God help us.
It was directly across the street from the bus stop. The music was so loud I had no choice but to listen to this litany of f-bombs and the n-word, and women being called the b-word, and talk of guns and violence. They were blaring from a store with a huge orange-on-black Boost Mobile sign, and underneath, two smaller signs, one reading Boost Mobile and one reading Virgin Mobile.
Of course it occurs to me that Boost and Virgin likely know very little of this one storeowner's actions. But I have to tell you that my visceral response to hearing this trash was "I will never do business with Boost Mobile or Vigin Mobile." I realize that I should have crossed the street to let the shopkeeper know I found his music offensive. And I think I've spoken in the past about how abhorrent it is that we live in a society where use of the b-word, the n-word and the f-word are considered normative.
How do we change that? One of the most effective change motivators I know of is money. And even though Boost and Virgin both cater to the same crowd that's likely not to have very much money and is also likely to tolerate such verbal assaults (or worse yet, consider them normative), I need to speak out on it.
We desperately need work in our communities -- transformative work, so that our young people understand the consequences of their behaviors. We need to transform the collective self-esteem of those who live in economically, socially, or otherwise-challenged individuals. You may not have money, you may not have status, you may not have material things, but there is an innate sense of worth, pride, and value that I just don't see in our youth. I see a cavalier attitude about life (more intense than the normal arrogance of youth), and a lack of knowledge of their own personal power. It's as if poor black and brown kids believe the hype -- they actually believe the deck is stacked against them, that they'll never amount to anything, and it's fruitless to have goals for anything other than sports or selling drugs.
I think this has come about because of generations of babies raising babies, none of whom have been instilled with adequate parenting skills or knowledge of their connection to Divinity. Quite frankly, I think that once we took God out of the ghetto, we opened the door for satan to come in, and he is roaming about like a hungry lion, seeking whom to devour. We (collectively, as a people) have no armor or defenses against him because we have no knowledge of our spiritual roots.
So we let companies like Boost Mobile and Virgin Mobile come into our communities. We allow them to rob our pockets and assault our ears with racist, mysogynistic vitriol. And we keep coming back.
God help us.
Saturday, June 25, 2011
Bigotry and Pride
It's amazing to me how people can, on the one hand, whine and complain about the effects of bigotry on their demographic group and on the other hand, engage in bigotry against others. Three things immediately come to mind.
First of all, there's the whole thing with the modern-day nation of Israel. There you have people who live in a nation created as a refuge from the hatred and bigotry visited among Jewish people throughout history, but most notably in the holocaust of world war II (and no, I'm not capitalizing it). I've ranted on it before and will likely rant on it again when I go back tot he Middle East in a few months.
Then I look at us African-Americans. I work in the ghetto, and about the only places that deliver in the ghetto are what I call the "ghetto Chinese" places. They're the cheap Chinese joints you only find in the ghetto. There was a delivery guy cycling through the ghetto, and a group of folk - I think they were black, but may have been black and hispanic -- and they started talking about "ching chong" and that "effing ch**nk." I think the racism is despicable. I also think it's significant that you have people who are strolling along happily in a culture of government "entitlement" programs that effectively destroy and erode the natural human tendency towards self-reliance -- you have people immersed in that culture who are lashing out at folks who choose not to be part of that culture. If I haven't ranted on this before, I will at another time.
Finally, you have the Christian bigots who have just worked my last nerve. The Gay Marriage thing passed in NY yesterday. OK, my Christian friends, I get it that you think homosexuality is an abomination. I get that, cuz I read the same Bible you do (although nobody has ever yet explained to me why it's ok to harp on that Levitical teaching but we can sell ham sandwiches (I believe eating pork is also an abomination) and wear two different kinds of clothes and fail to stone people caught in adultery and we black people no longer have to remain slaves and obey our masters. Nobody ever explained to me why it's ok to rationalize away some parts of the Word of God but not be able to rationalize away other parts.
But what gets me is that the Bible I read says that "WHILE WE WERE YET IN OUR SINS, CHRIST DIED FOR US." Now, in my understanding, that means that even though Christ knew I would fall short of the Law, He still saw fit to shed His blood and offer His life as a sacrifice for my sins. So who am I to judge someone else's sins instead of offering them the love of Christ? Yeah, you think being gay is a sin. OK. While you were sinning, Christ died for you. And you're going to repay that by being a jerk to somebody who's gay. That says a lot about your Christian witness.
I was particularly perturbed by the posting of a friend of mine. He's a guy I know and love. He's also a guy who looks to be about 4 or 5 hundred pounds. I've struggled with weight all my life, and shed about 100 pounds only with surgical intervention, so I'm not trying to be anti-People of Size. But when I was larger, I was painfully aware of the fact that my weight contributed to multiple other health issues which, collectively, led to the malaise of my temple, the body God entrusted to me. And I just think that before we Christians get all crazy about what somebody else is doing with their bodies, that perhaps we ought to take a look at what we're doing with our bodies, and how our temple maintenance reflects our Christian witness.
It seems there was some confusion in the Harlem community regarding Harlem Pride. Now, the Pride phenomenon has existed for probably a couple of decades. I know I was in Gay Pride parades with Standup Harlem before my mother died. When, after the Marriage Equality bill passed, a friend of mine posted to his FB status, "now I'm as good as you!" I was shocked and suddenly remembered the early days of the Pride movement. Of course African Americans would stand in solidarity with gays. It was all about equal rights. So anyway, apparently last year there was a Harlem Pride event and some people showed up thinking it meant Harlem (Neighborhood) pride. They were apparently offended to find out it was a Harlem gay pride event, and tried to start some madness, saying they were going to protest Harlem Pride today.
Never one to miss a good controversy, and since some friends of mine were in the area, I went with them to Harlem Pride. What a disappointment. Instead of something fierce or fabulous, I saw a ragtag group of folk who remind me of the people at the Gay and Lesbian Community Center. They are, I contend, people who need a club or something to belong to in order to give them identity. (Most of the gay people I know have lives that are full and complete. The few gay people I've met at events around the Gay and Lesbian Community Center just seem challenged in a variety of ways. To me it seems they have issues and the whole sexuality thing is just a shield. And that's what I saw at Harlem Pride today: not the hunky, muscular guys in shorts and tees who'll be dancing tomorrow, but just a bunch of people with issues wrapped up in rainbow colors.
But I was happy to check it out. We didn't tarry, and went to one of the friend's new apartment. He's moving from East Harlem to Central Harlem, just off 125th, near Lenox and 7th. You don't get more Central Harlem than that. Yet he lives in a building where I didn't see any black people. He says there are two black people that he's seen -- but there's 24 or 26 units in the building, and we're talking 1 or 2 units with black people in it. But then, what is to be expected when apartments are at least half a million dollars? More and more, Manhattan is a haven for people in the projects and the wealthy. Most of the projects were built with government tax credits or other subsidies. As these subsidies and the benefits for building low-income housing expires, I believe more and more of these buildings will become homes of the weathly. Increasingly, poor people will be forced to the outer boros.
But that's another kind of bigotry. In a day where we celebrated the social rights of people with diverse sexual orientations, I saw highlighted the waning economic rights (as in opportunities) of people who are not academically or intellectually or socially prepared for the ratrace that is Manhattan Island. We need poor people to guard and clean our buildings, deliver our food, and clean and repair our homes, but we don't want them to live among us. That's the message I saw today. What I saw today was that in New York, "I'm as good as you" apparently is true for people who are black, and/or female, and/or gay or lesbian, but not for people who are poor.
Bigotry and Pride. They're still alive and well in New York....
First of all, there's the whole thing with the modern-day nation of Israel. There you have people who live in a nation created as a refuge from the hatred and bigotry visited among Jewish people throughout history, but most notably in the holocaust of world war II (and no, I'm not capitalizing it). I've ranted on it before and will likely rant on it again when I go back tot he Middle East in a few months.
Then I look at us African-Americans. I work in the ghetto, and about the only places that deliver in the ghetto are what I call the "ghetto Chinese" places. They're the cheap Chinese joints you only find in the ghetto. There was a delivery guy cycling through the ghetto, and a group of folk - I think they were black, but may have been black and hispanic -- and they started talking about "ching chong" and that "effing ch**nk." I think the racism is despicable. I also think it's significant that you have people who are strolling along happily in a culture of government "entitlement" programs that effectively destroy and erode the natural human tendency towards self-reliance -- you have people immersed in that culture who are lashing out at folks who choose not to be part of that culture. If I haven't ranted on this before, I will at another time.
Finally, you have the Christian bigots who have just worked my last nerve. The Gay Marriage thing passed in NY yesterday. OK, my Christian friends, I get it that you think homosexuality is an abomination. I get that, cuz I read the same Bible you do (although nobody has ever yet explained to me why it's ok to harp on that Levitical teaching but we can sell ham sandwiches (I believe eating pork is also an abomination) and wear two different kinds of clothes and fail to stone people caught in adultery and we black people no longer have to remain slaves and obey our masters. Nobody ever explained to me why it's ok to rationalize away some parts of the Word of God but not be able to rationalize away other parts.
But what gets me is that the Bible I read says that "WHILE WE WERE YET IN OUR SINS, CHRIST DIED FOR US." Now, in my understanding, that means that even though Christ knew I would fall short of the Law, He still saw fit to shed His blood and offer His life as a sacrifice for my sins. So who am I to judge someone else's sins instead of offering them the love of Christ? Yeah, you think being gay is a sin. OK. While you were sinning, Christ died for you. And you're going to repay that by being a jerk to somebody who's gay. That says a lot about your Christian witness.
I was particularly perturbed by the posting of a friend of mine. He's a guy I know and love. He's also a guy who looks to be about 4 or 5 hundred pounds. I've struggled with weight all my life, and shed about 100 pounds only with surgical intervention, so I'm not trying to be anti-People of Size. But when I was larger, I was painfully aware of the fact that my weight contributed to multiple other health issues which, collectively, led to the malaise of my temple, the body God entrusted to me. And I just think that before we Christians get all crazy about what somebody else is doing with their bodies, that perhaps we ought to take a look at what we're doing with our bodies, and how our temple maintenance reflects our Christian witness.
It seems there was some confusion in the Harlem community regarding Harlem Pride. Now, the Pride phenomenon has existed for probably a couple of decades. I know I was in Gay Pride parades with Standup Harlem before my mother died. When, after the Marriage Equality bill passed, a friend of mine posted to his FB status, "now I'm as good as you!" I was shocked and suddenly remembered the early days of the Pride movement. Of course African Americans would stand in solidarity with gays. It was all about equal rights. So anyway, apparently last year there was a Harlem Pride event and some people showed up thinking it meant Harlem (Neighborhood) pride. They were apparently offended to find out it was a Harlem gay pride event, and tried to start some madness, saying they were going to protest Harlem Pride today.
Never one to miss a good controversy, and since some friends of mine were in the area, I went with them to Harlem Pride. What a disappointment. Instead of something fierce or fabulous, I saw a ragtag group of folk who remind me of the people at the Gay and Lesbian Community Center. They are, I contend, people who need a club or something to belong to in order to give them identity. (Most of the gay people I know have lives that are full and complete. The few gay people I've met at events around the Gay and Lesbian Community Center just seem challenged in a variety of ways. To me it seems they have issues and the whole sexuality thing is just a shield. And that's what I saw at Harlem Pride today: not the hunky, muscular guys in shorts and tees who'll be dancing tomorrow, but just a bunch of people with issues wrapped up in rainbow colors.
But I was happy to check it out. We didn't tarry, and went to one of the friend's new apartment. He's moving from East Harlem to Central Harlem, just off 125th, near Lenox and 7th. You don't get more Central Harlem than that. Yet he lives in a building where I didn't see any black people. He says there are two black people that he's seen -- but there's 24 or 26 units in the building, and we're talking 1 or 2 units with black people in it. But then, what is to be expected when apartments are at least half a million dollars? More and more, Manhattan is a haven for people in the projects and the wealthy. Most of the projects were built with government tax credits or other subsidies. As these subsidies and the benefits for building low-income housing expires, I believe more and more of these buildings will become homes of the weathly. Increasingly, poor people will be forced to the outer boros.
But that's another kind of bigotry. In a day where we celebrated the social rights of people with diverse sexual orientations, I saw highlighted the waning economic rights (as in opportunities) of people who are not academically or intellectually or socially prepared for the ratrace that is Manhattan Island. We need poor people to guard and clean our buildings, deliver our food, and clean and repair our homes, but we don't want them to live among us. That's the message I saw today. What I saw today was that in New York, "I'm as good as you" apparently is true for people who are black, and/or female, and/or gay or lesbian, but not for people who are poor.
Bigotry and Pride. They're still alive and well in New York....
Sunday, June 19, 2011
13,000 updates, Green Lantern, Marriage Equality
Does anyone else run a Windows machine and find that, first of all it FORCES you to do updates?Like I want to shut down my computer, but it has decided it wants to take an extra 20 minutes and do 17 updates. Then the next time I cut it on, it has to do over 13,000 more updates (which appear to be registry edits, and happen quite quickly on the machine with 4GB of RAM.) I even understand that the updates are necessary because people intentionally write code to invade and infect the machines. I understand all that, but it doesn't make it any less annoying. It'll be interesting to see how the process runs on the machine with only 2GB of RAM. It doesn't have as many apps, so it may run a bit quicker.
Talking about annoying. Went to see Green Lantern today. Waited for my chronologically and geographically challenged young son, Amit, to arrive. He lives in Edison, NJ, but can never get to the theater on time. Mostly, I think, because when he tells me he's getting on the train he's actually either getting out of bed or getting out of the shower. Either that or he can't realize that the trains go local every weekend. But he's a cool young man; strong on technical knowledge and conversation and not well-enough-versed in anything else to be annoying. The only other things he likes are sports and making/saving money, so we're cool. He's not only a genuinely nice guy, but still young enough that the world is still full of awe and wonder for him. Here's to you, Amit! I can write all this because even though I'll give him the link to this blog, he'll never read it. Way too many words for him. :-)
Once he finally arrived, we went to see Green Lantern. We've seen trailers for it at every movie for the last several months, and the line "I pledge allegiance to a lantern that I got from a dying purple alien" was enough to intrigue me. The first thing I noticed about the movie was that Sinestro looked just like I remembered him from the comic books. And I've only read maybe one or two Green Lantern comics -- he was never my favorite. Granted, they did have to condense a lot of history, but for $17.00, I expect the 3-D to pop (this looked like it was added after filming); and I expect a story line that doesn't literally have me falling asleep in the first half. I even had this whole dialogue in my head trying to lay a Christian theme on top of it, with the fear-feeding Paralyto as Satan, the Green Lantern Corps as the Angels, the Green Lantern as a Jesus archetype, Sinestro as Satan before he fell from grace in heaven, and so on. Still didn't work for me. It seems like in the second half of the movie, they started pulling their act together, but it made me decide that I'll get the bootlegs first before actually buying any more movies. This is one that can definitely wait for DVD. It grossed $52 million this weekend; I think it's just the gullible suckers who didn't know any better. We saw it near Penn Station, in a theater that's normally full. There may have been 20 people there.
Today there's lots of talk about Marriage Equality in NY State. I want to say a few words about that. I've spoken on it before, and my personal position is not the position of my church. I've taken vows in and willingly submit myself to the authority of my church, but I voice my disagreement when I think it's wrong. It's a typically homophobic African-American church. 'Nuff said there.
So here's what I think about Marriage Equality. I think that all Americans should receive the same treatment. I don't think that some Americans should get preferential tax, immigration, or survivor's benefits that are denied to other Americans solely on the basis of how they express their sexuality. Here's what I mean: marriage carries with it certain civil privileges. Given that, you can't deny people the ability to marry and receive those privileges based solely on their sexual identity. Even if you don't agree with their sexual identity or you have personal or theological issues with their sexual identity, you don't get to discriminate against them. It's just like discriminating against people because they're black, or not US-born, or because they're Christian.
I believe that marriage as a RELIGIOUS observance is a divine and sacred institution (sacrament to some). I don't believe the State can dictate that a religion has to believe or behave a certain way. We can't make the Catholic church allow female priests, we couldn't make Mormons believe that black people were equal to whites (until they got a divine "revelation"); you can't make observant Jewish people eat swine meat, and you can't force theologically conservative Christians to condone either homosexuality or gay marriage. The State simply can't do that. That's something the Holy Spirit does, not the State.
As much as I am Christian and enjoy the tainted fruit of Constantine's bastard 4th century dealings, I think the fact that religious marriages have been granted special civil status is, at best, warped. What I believe my prof said was that the State used the Church as its agent. The Church became an agent of the State in ratifying marriages (which should have been a civil function). Over time, both civil and religious marriages have taken on a semi-sacred nature and now there seems to exist some confusion between them. A religious ceremony is just that, and is governed by the tenets of the religion. A civil ceremony, the reflection of a business arrangement, should be available to everyone.
Allowing gay people to marry does not, in my opinion, detract anything from the sacred, sacramental, or religious nature of marriage. What detracts from the sacred nature of marriage is the number of people who spend thousands of dollars to go to the altar declaring their love for another person, and who, for whatever reason, lack the commitment and/or ability to stay in the marriage, sometimes terminating it before the wedding is even paid for.
If we religious people are concerned about the sanctity of marriage, then we need to regard it as sacred. Our clergy need to stop marrying everybody who waves a dollar in front of them. Our clergy need to counsel couples before, during, and after the weddings. We need to require that people actually have a relationship with a church before attempting to get married there. Let's face it -- weddings are moneymakers, and they draw people to our churches. But we need to lift Jesus and have Him draw people to our churches. We need to have every activity in our churches reflect Jesus' presence in our lives (and for those religious people who are not Christian, the same holds true -- the religious marriage ceremony should reflect the religious commitment of those being married).
Perhaps then, the people who enter into the religious institution of marriage would treat their marriages with more respect. Perhaps then there might be some sort of statistical difference in the failure rates between religious and non-religious marriages. According to a 2000 Barna report, Christians and Jews had higher divorce rates than atheists and agnostics. It didn't list divorce rates on Muslims, Buddhists, Hindus, or other religions, so either they don't get divorced or they were not statistically significant to Barna in 2000.....
While I don't think "marriage equality" is a "right" for all Americans (I think the phrasing is a bit of a misnomer), I do believe that the ability to enjoy the benefits of being married should be available to all Americans who seek to avail themselves of those benefits. I don't need or want a tax credit for having a roommate; while we may share a roof, we've probably not made a commitment to share each other's lives. But if I've made that commitment with another person, and if I'm living in and honoring that commitment, and if the State has deemed that people who live in and honor that commitment get certain privileges, then I should get those privileges. They shouldn't be gender-specific.
It's touchy, and it goes against tradition. I do believe, for instance, that there should be gender segregation in sports. And I'm not so sure I'd want a 5'2" female firefighter coming to rescue me from a burning building. Where there are clear gender-based physical differences, then I'm in favor of gender discrimination. But what's the big deal with letting gay people marry? That doesn't erode our society or our morals; if anything, it helps us to make stable, loving, committed relationships normative.
A word here to the folk who equate homosexuality with pedophilia or bestiality or incest -- well, y'all and your nasty minds can stay in the gutter. I never understand those people who talk about people "turning" gay. While it is true that many people have some fluidity in their sexual orientation, most people I know can't "choose" their sexuality. If you think people can "turn" gay or "choose" their sexuality, I got news for you: you're bisexual. Which is probably why you're having such a fit about gay marriage -- you're afraid you won't be able to hide any more. I also don't get why folks always equate homosexuality with specific sexual acts. Why are you men so interested in where another man is putting his dingaling? What's that saying about you? I've spent lots of time with lots of women. I spend a lot of time naked in locker rooms and saunas with other women. We sit around and have long conversations, in and out of the sauna and in the locker areas, completely nude and yet we give very little thought to each others' vaginas. What's up with you menfolks on that issue?
Guess my rant is over. If we want to defend marriage, we should defend marriage, not discriminate against gays.... Handle your own business: let your computer update, don't see Green Lantern, and let adults who love each other get married.
Talking about annoying. Went to see Green Lantern today. Waited for my chronologically and geographically challenged young son, Amit, to arrive. He lives in Edison, NJ, but can never get to the theater on time. Mostly, I think, because when he tells me he's getting on the train he's actually either getting out of bed or getting out of the shower. Either that or he can't realize that the trains go local every weekend. But he's a cool young man; strong on technical knowledge and conversation and not well-enough-versed in anything else to be annoying. The only other things he likes are sports and making/saving money, so we're cool. He's not only a genuinely nice guy, but still young enough that the world is still full of awe and wonder for him. Here's to you, Amit! I can write all this because even though I'll give him the link to this blog, he'll never read it. Way too many words for him. :-)
Once he finally arrived, we went to see Green Lantern. We've seen trailers for it at every movie for the last several months, and the line "I pledge allegiance to a lantern that I got from a dying purple alien" was enough to intrigue me. The first thing I noticed about the movie was that Sinestro looked just like I remembered him from the comic books. And I've only read maybe one or two Green Lantern comics -- he was never my favorite. Granted, they did have to condense a lot of history, but for $17.00, I expect the 3-D to pop (this looked like it was added after filming); and I expect a story line that doesn't literally have me falling asleep in the first half. I even had this whole dialogue in my head trying to lay a Christian theme on top of it, with the fear-feeding Paralyto as Satan, the Green Lantern Corps as the Angels, the Green Lantern as a Jesus archetype, Sinestro as Satan before he fell from grace in heaven, and so on. Still didn't work for me. It seems like in the second half of the movie, they started pulling their act together, but it made me decide that I'll get the bootlegs first before actually buying any more movies. This is one that can definitely wait for DVD. It grossed $52 million this weekend; I think it's just the gullible suckers who didn't know any better. We saw it near Penn Station, in a theater that's normally full. There may have been 20 people there.
Today there's lots of talk about Marriage Equality in NY State. I want to say a few words about that. I've spoken on it before, and my personal position is not the position of my church. I've taken vows in and willingly submit myself to the authority of my church, but I voice my disagreement when I think it's wrong. It's a typically homophobic African-American church. 'Nuff said there.
So here's what I think about Marriage Equality. I think that all Americans should receive the same treatment. I don't think that some Americans should get preferential tax, immigration, or survivor's benefits that are denied to other Americans solely on the basis of how they express their sexuality. Here's what I mean: marriage carries with it certain civil privileges. Given that, you can't deny people the ability to marry and receive those privileges based solely on their sexual identity. Even if you don't agree with their sexual identity or you have personal or theological issues with their sexual identity, you don't get to discriminate against them. It's just like discriminating against people because they're black, or not US-born, or because they're Christian.
I believe that marriage as a RELIGIOUS observance is a divine and sacred institution (sacrament to some). I don't believe the State can dictate that a religion has to believe or behave a certain way. We can't make the Catholic church allow female priests, we couldn't make Mormons believe that black people were equal to whites (until they got a divine "revelation"); you can't make observant Jewish people eat swine meat, and you can't force theologically conservative Christians to condone either homosexuality or gay marriage. The State simply can't do that. That's something the Holy Spirit does, not the State.
As much as I am Christian and enjoy the tainted fruit of Constantine's bastard 4th century dealings, I think the fact that religious marriages have been granted special civil status is, at best, warped. What I believe my prof said was that the State used the Church as its agent. The Church became an agent of the State in ratifying marriages (which should have been a civil function). Over time, both civil and religious marriages have taken on a semi-sacred nature and now there seems to exist some confusion between them. A religious ceremony is just that, and is governed by the tenets of the religion. A civil ceremony, the reflection of a business arrangement, should be available to everyone.
Allowing gay people to marry does not, in my opinion, detract anything from the sacred, sacramental, or religious nature of marriage. What detracts from the sacred nature of marriage is the number of people who spend thousands of dollars to go to the altar declaring their love for another person, and who, for whatever reason, lack the commitment and/or ability to stay in the marriage, sometimes terminating it before the wedding is even paid for.
If we religious people are concerned about the sanctity of marriage, then we need to regard it as sacred. Our clergy need to stop marrying everybody who waves a dollar in front of them. Our clergy need to counsel couples before, during, and after the weddings. We need to require that people actually have a relationship with a church before attempting to get married there. Let's face it -- weddings are moneymakers, and they draw people to our churches. But we need to lift Jesus and have Him draw people to our churches. We need to have every activity in our churches reflect Jesus' presence in our lives (and for those religious people who are not Christian, the same holds true -- the religious marriage ceremony should reflect the religious commitment of those being married).
Perhaps then, the people who enter into the religious institution of marriage would treat their marriages with more respect. Perhaps then there might be some sort of statistical difference in the failure rates between religious and non-religious marriages. According to a 2000 Barna report, Christians and Jews had higher divorce rates than atheists and agnostics. It didn't list divorce rates on Muslims, Buddhists, Hindus, or other religions, so either they don't get divorced or they were not statistically significant to Barna in 2000.....
While I don't think "marriage equality" is a "right" for all Americans (I think the phrasing is a bit of a misnomer), I do believe that the ability to enjoy the benefits of being married should be available to all Americans who seek to avail themselves of those benefits. I don't need or want a tax credit for having a roommate; while we may share a roof, we've probably not made a commitment to share each other's lives. But if I've made that commitment with another person, and if I'm living in and honoring that commitment, and if the State has deemed that people who live in and honor that commitment get certain privileges, then I should get those privileges. They shouldn't be gender-specific.
It's touchy, and it goes against tradition. I do believe, for instance, that there should be gender segregation in sports. And I'm not so sure I'd want a 5'2" female firefighter coming to rescue me from a burning building. Where there are clear gender-based physical differences, then I'm in favor of gender discrimination. But what's the big deal with letting gay people marry? That doesn't erode our society or our morals; if anything, it helps us to make stable, loving, committed relationships normative.
A word here to the folk who equate homosexuality with pedophilia or bestiality or incest -- well, y'all and your nasty minds can stay in the gutter. I never understand those people who talk about people "turning" gay. While it is true that many people have some fluidity in their sexual orientation, most people I know can't "choose" their sexuality. If you think people can "turn" gay or "choose" their sexuality, I got news for you: you're bisexual. Which is probably why you're having such a fit about gay marriage -- you're afraid you won't be able to hide any more. I also don't get why folks always equate homosexuality with specific sexual acts. Why are you men so interested in where another man is putting his dingaling? What's that saying about you? I've spent lots of time with lots of women. I spend a lot of time naked in locker rooms and saunas with other women. We sit around and have long conversations, in and out of the sauna and in the locker areas, completely nude and yet we give very little thought to each others' vaginas. What's up with you menfolks on that issue?
Guess my rant is over. If we want to defend marriage, we should defend marriage, not discriminate against gays.... Handle your own business: let your computer update, don't see Green Lantern, and let adults who love each other get married.
Saturday, June 18, 2011
SAVE the Date: FUNDraiser!
Trying to take full advantage of the whole social media thing to advance my organization, so I have my blog entries set up to tweet automatically, and I just set Twitter up to feed FB. That may be a little TMI on a regular basis (I don't share my blog with everyone on FB; only those who are motivated enough to look it up on my profile). But I need to inundate everyone I know, especially those of you who live in Manahattan, regarding the FUNdraiser we're having. Most of you know I'm the Executive Director of a nonprofit that provides low income housing and other supportive services for people. Come October, the organization will have been around for 45 years. We're in Phoenix mode right now, and our latest effort is that we're partnering with California Pizza Kitchen as a fundraiser. It will work like this
You take this flyer:
Print it out.
On Thursday, September 8, you go to the California Pizza Kitchen at 30th Street and Park Avenue South in Manhattan. (be sure to take the flyer with you!).
Eat. Drink. Be Merry.
Give the flyer to the server when you pay your check.
TWENTY PERCENT of the profits from all checks presented with the flyer will be donated to our organization.
Tell Everyone you know, so this is repeated throughout the day, the house is packed, and we get money to continue offering the Strength, Support, and Stabiliity that are so crucial for those on the journey from homelessness to housing.
But, Really, folks: This is awesome! Instead of asking people to dress up in an evening gown or a tux, pay $100.00 for a rubber chicken and listen to a lot of boring speeches, all we're asking you to do is go to a specific restaurant AT ANY TIME during a specific day, and buy food. Everybody's got to eat, right? So start planning now to come out and support us on Thursday, September 8, 2011 at the California Pizza Kitchen in Manhattan!!
You take this flyer:
Print it out.
On Thursday, September 8, you go to the California Pizza Kitchen at 30th Street and Park Avenue South in Manhattan. (be sure to take the flyer with you!).
Eat. Drink. Be Merry.
Give the flyer to the server when you pay your check.
TWENTY PERCENT of the profits from all checks presented with the flyer will be donated to our organization.
Tell Everyone you know, so this is repeated throughout the day, the house is packed, and we get money to continue offering the Strength, Support, and Stabiliity that are so crucial for those on the journey from homelessness to housing.
But, Really, folks: This is awesome! Instead of asking people to dress up in an evening gown or a tux, pay $100.00 for a rubber chicken and listen to a lot of boring speeches, all we're asking you to do is go to a specific restaurant AT ANY TIME during a specific day, and buy food. Everybody's got to eat, right? So start planning now to come out and support us on Thursday, September 8, 2011 at the California Pizza Kitchen in Manhattan!!
Friday, June 10, 2011
My knee; Bible Study; our FUNdraiser!
Thank the Lord it's Friday!!! Yesterday was uncomfortably hot, but I'm not complaining. I'll take too hot over too cold any day.
So the knee. It's not getting any better, and I finally found the time to go to my orthopedist. He'd suggested we take a look and consider scraping some of the arthitic growth off the knee. So we did X-rays (my doctor's office is affiliated with Lenox Hill Radiology. Actually, a couple of my doctors are.) What's cool about them is they make the capital investment in cutting edge medical technology, which results in an enhanced patient experience, which means you're likely to keep using them. For instance: I had an 8:30 am appointment yesterday (btw, I'm not sure I have any reason to see doctors who don't respect my time enough to have office hours outside the 9-5 window). So I had an 8:30 appointment. He looks, we talk, we decide on X-rays. I go down the hall and the X-ray tech does the X-rays. I don't have to get undressed, don't have to do anything but stand there and let him position the machine to me. I remember back in the day when you had to angle your knee all kinds of ways to get X-rays, I think because they used fixed machines. But with the rotating machines, you can just stand there and the machine adapts to you. And no more waiting -- before you leave the room, the X-ray tech has the views (guess I can't call them films any more) up on the monitor and you can see them.
So then I go back to my waiting room, and the doc comes back. He pulls up the views on a computer and we look at my knees. He shows me the narrowing of that space where the cartilage is spozed to be, shows me the bone spurs (that are causing that clicking and catching in my knee), and shows me the arthritic deposits. Then we have a conversation about next steps. I love the fact that every single doctor I have is a co-partner with me in my health care. They all understand and respect the fact that I am granted stewardship over my body, and that they are simply trusted servants for my journey.
We talked. My primary concerns are quality of life: no, I'm not going to stop working out, and I need to jump out of this plane in August, and I need to climb all the way to the top of Mt. Sinai in November. So we decided we'd do the arthroscopic debridement. And then we scheduled it for June 15, because I need to get healed as soon as possible so I can do that airplane jump. I left his office (this all probably took about an hour), went to take care of some work business at the bank, and then headed back to the office.
Thankfully, I remembered to call my primary physician's office to get the pre-op testing done. My PCP has a twin, and ever since I've been going to Israel, he's been talking about taking a trip there with his twin. It's for some birthday, maybe 65, I don't remember. But he's finally going at the end of the summer. I'm excited for him; it's something he's wanted to do for a long time. And I know all that because I called his office about noonish and was given a 4:30 appointment. That's right, even in NYC you can call your doctor and get an appointment for the same day. Of course it wasn't with him; it was with a medical assistant and a physician's assistant and another, more junior, MD; but I got what I needed done.
This morning I picked up the after-surgery meds (again, I love the planning. No more waiting until after surgery when you're in pain to get your meds; get them before the surgery so you'll have them ready when you need them!). I've gotten my bloods drawn, I have the email addy of the coordinator and the date of the surgery. Now all I need is someone to pick me up (I still don't like that requirement: because I'm having surgery, I have to ask someone else to interrupt their day? But I'm the doctor's responsibility until someone else signs that I'm their responsibility.
It will be interesting to see what happens with the knee.
On another note, my Bishop called earlier this week and asked me to team teach Bible Study at Annual Conference. The person I'll be teaching with is a former assistant to the Bishop, and since he's like my father in ministry, it's a big honor. It's a big honor, anyway, but the fact that he selected the man who used to work closely with him and the little girl he nurtured in the faith is a fact that is not lost on me. As I said to him, I'd be delighted, honored, and privileged to do it! I had the privilege of teaching Bible Study once before at Annual Conference, but in an abysmal breakdown of planning, the Bible Study was in a room separated only by a partition from the Young Adult Breakfast, where several candidates for Bishop were busy making their cases. We were literally drowned out by the politicians in the next room.
It's also interesting to me to note how we "Christians" can never manage to go to Bible Study, and how in our Christian organizations (church, conferences, etc), we actually schedule other activities in the same time slot as Bible Study. Granted, I am biased: in my mind, studying the Bible and engaging in worldly activities are not in the same league. It's the whole Mary/Martha dichotomy (Luke 10:38-42). Now, to me, Mary, who sat at the feet of Jesus and learned from him -- Mary's approach is the more nobler one. Martha, after all, was the one who was scurrying about making the house ready for visitors. It is important to do all that stuff, but as Jesus said, "Martha -- you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her." It just seems to me that Jesus Himself has told us we should focus on Him and His Word, or, as the Gospel of Matthew tells us, we should "Seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness, and all these (other) things will be given to you as well." I just think if we seek God first, everything else will fall into place.
Finally, I want to post here about a FUNdraiser we're having. Most people reading this know I'm the Executive Director of a nonprofit that provides low income housing and other supportive services for people. We're partnering with California Pizza Kitchen to raise money for our event. It will work like this
You take this flyer:
Print it out.
On Thursday, September 8, you go to the California Pizza Kitchen at 30th Street and Park Avenue South in Manhattan. (be sure to take the flyer with you!).
Eat. Drink. Be Merry.
Give the flyer to the server when you pay your check.
TWENTY PERCENT of the profits from all checks presented with the flyer will be donated to our organization.
This is awesome! Instead of asking people to dress up in an evening gown or a tux, pay $100.00 for a rubber chicken and listen to a lot of boring speeches, all we're asking you to do is go to a specific restaurant AT ANY TIME during a specific day, and buy food. Everybody's got to eat, right? So start saving now and plan to come out and support us on Thursday, September 8, 2011 at the California Pizza Kitchen in Manhattan!!
So the knee. It's not getting any better, and I finally found the time to go to my orthopedist. He'd suggested we take a look and consider scraping some of the arthitic growth off the knee. So we did X-rays (my doctor's office is affiliated with Lenox Hill Radiology. Actually, a couple of my doctors are.) What's cool about them is they make the capital investment in cutting edge medical technology, which results in an enhanced patient experience, which means you're likely to keep using them. For instance: I had an 8:30 am appointment yesterday (btw, I'm not sure I have any reason to see doctors who don't respect my time enough to have office hours outside the 9-5 window). So I had an 8:30 appointment. He looks, we talk, we decide on X-rays. I go down the hall and the X-ray tech does the X-rays. I don't have to get undressed, don't have to do anything but stand there and let him position the machine to me. I remember back in the day when you had to angle your knee all kinds of ways to get X-rays, I think because they used fixed machines. But with the rotating machines, you can just stand there and the machine adapts to you. And no more waiting -- before you leave the room, the X-ray tech has the views (guess I can't call them films any more) up on the monitor and you can see them.
So then I go back to my waiting room, and the doc comes back. He pulls up the views on a computer and we look at my knees. He shows me the narrowing of that space where the cartilage is spozed to be, shows me the bone spurs (that are causing that clicking and catching in my knee), and shows me the arthritic deposits. Then we have a conversation about next steps. I love the fact that every single doctor I have is a co-partner with me in my health care. They all understand and respect the fact that I am granted stewardship over my body, and that they are simply trusted servants for my journey.
We talked. My primary concerns are quality of life: no, I'm not going to stop working out, and I need to jump out of this plane in August, and I need to climb all the way to the top of Mt. Sinai in November. So we decided we'd do the arthroscopic debridement. And then we scheduled it for June 15, because I need to get healed as soon as possible so I can do that airplane jump. I left his office (this all probably took about an hour), went to take care of some work business at the bank, and then headed back to the office.
Thankfully, I remembered to call my primary physician's office to get the pre-op testing done. My PCP has a twin, and ever since I've been going to Israel, he's been talking about taking a trip there with his twin. It's for some birthday, maybe 65, I don't remember. But he's finally going at the end of the summer. I'm excited for him; it's something he's wanted to do for a long time. And I know all that because I called his office about noonish and was given a 4:30 appointment. That's right, even in NYC you can call your doctor and get an appointment for the same day. Of course it wasn't with him; it was with a medical assistant and a physician's assistant and another, more junior, MD; but I got what I needed done.
This morning I picked up the after-surgery meds (again, I love the planning. No more waiting until after surgery when you're in pain to get your meds; get them before the surgery so you'll have them ready when you need them!). I've gotten my bloods drawn, I have the email addy of the coordinator and the date of the surgery. Now all I need is someone to pick me up (I still don't like that requirement: because I'm having surgery, I have to ask someone else to interrupt their day? But I'm the doctor's responsibility until someone else signs that I'm their responsibility.
It will be interesting to see what happens with the knee.
On another note, my Bishop called earlier this week and asked me to team teach Bible Study at Annual Conference. The person I'll be teaching with is a former assistant to the Bishop, and since he's like my father in ministry, it's a big honor. It's a big honor, anyway, but the fact that he selected the man who used to work closely with him and the little girl he nurtured in the faith is a fact that is not lost on me. As I said to him, I'd be delighted, honored, and privileged to do it! I had the privilege of teaching Bible Study once before at Annual Conference, but in an abysmal breakdown of planning, the Bible Study was in a room separated only by a partition from the Young Adult Breakfast, where several candidates for Bishop were busy making their cases. We were literally drowned out by the politicians in the next room.
It's also interesting to me to note how we "Christians" can never manage to go to Bible Study, and how in our Christian organizations (church, conferences, etc), we actually schedule other activities in the same time slot as Bible Study. Granted, I am biased: in my mind, studying the Bible and engaging in worldly activities are not in the same league. It's the whole Mary/Martha dichotomy (Luke 10:38-42). Now, to me, Mary, who sat at the feet of Jesus and learned from him -- Mary's approach is the more nobler one. Martha, after all, was the one who was scurrying about making the house ready for visitors. It is important to do all that stuff, but as Jesus said, "Martha -- you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her." It just seems to me that Jesus Himself has told us we should focus on Him and His Word, or, as the Gospel of Matthew tells us, we should "Seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness, and all these (other) things will be given to you as well." I just think if we seek God first, everything else will fall into place.
Finally, I want to post here about a FUNdraiser we're having. Most people reading this know I'm the Executive Director of a nonprofit that provides low income housing and other supportive services for people. We're partnering with California Pizza Kitchen to raise money for our event. It will work like this
You take this flyer:
Print it out.
On Thursday, September 8, you go to the California Pizza Kitchen at 30th Street and Park Avenue South in Manhattan. (be sure to take the flyer with you!).
Eat. Drink. Be Merry.
Give the flyer to the server when you pay your check.
TWENTY PERCENT of the profits from all checks presented with the flyer will be donated to our organization.
This is awesome! Instead of asking people to dress up in an evening gown or a tux, pay $100.00 for a rubber chicken and listen to a lot of boring speeches, all we're asking you to do is go to a specific restaurant AT ANY TIME during a specific day, and buy food. Everybody's got to eat, right? So start saving now and plan to come out and support us on Thursday, September 8, 2011 at the California Pizza Kitchen in Manhattan!!
Monday, June 6, 2011
Couponing
So today has been a hectic day. It's always nonstop when I come into the office; today a funder thinks they overpaid us by $450K and I had to figure out why; some employee who's chronically ill is getting worker's comp (which is sort of odd because they seldom do any work); meanwhile worker's comp thinks we owe them thousands of dollars for [who knows what. They're government bureaucrats and need to keep their jobs]. Add to that the time spent on the phone with the attys because someone didn't like the fact that they got fired, the local kid I'm hiring, the office optimization I'm attempting, and it was 1 pm before I looked up.
Headed out to get some lunch, came back, did some photo updates, and decided to finish last night's Vitamin Shoppe order. Recently lots of friends on FB have been couponing, and somewhere I heard someone say that when you're ordering you should just google the vendor. This appears to work better than Coupon Cabin, because Coupon Cabin now (like everything on the internet that used to be free) is so full of ads it's hardly worth the effort of visiting it (especially when your time is limited and your internet connection is closer to 1.5Mbps than the 5Mbps you're paying for). Vitamin Shoppe is already running a special for free shipping over $25.00. But I'm out of CoQ10, and the 200mg cap gets expensive ($0.33 per serving at VS, but I take 2-4 servings a day). I tend to buy in bulk, so it kicked the order up to over $100.00. It was about $117. I adjusted it a bit, but while I was adjusting it, I googled "vitamin shoppe coupon." I found a code for $25.00 off on an order of $150.00 or more. I actually needed more hyaluronic acid (helps with arthritic inflammation; also supposed to be good for skin), so by the time I added that and a small bottle of vitamin K, I just eked over the $150.00 mark. $153.30, to be exact. Which then brought my total down to $128.30. So the net-net is that I got a $17.00 bottle of hyaluronic acid for less than $10.00.
It's not a lot, but I try to only buy things I need, and to buy in bulk -- I usually buy vitamins twice a year, at Vitamin Shoppe's buy one, get one half off sale. For maintenance vitamins that I can't buy in bulk, I try to go to GNC during Gold Card week. I don't see the point in paying more if I can pay less, and if being frugal in small things allows me to save money so I can go on my trips (this is the second year I'll do TWO overseas trips. Pretty significant for someone who, during the dark years, couldn't scrape up enough extra money to get her passport renewed).
So yeah, I do couponing, and I shop in thrift stores, and I wait to buy things on sale. And I work three jobs. But I'ma climb Mt. Sinai, and I'ma jump out of an airplane, and I'ma do all the other things my heart desires. That's the tradeoff. No, I don't have a lot of time to spend hanging out, and no, I don't want to go out to dinner with you, and will only go to the movies with Amit because he's socially retarded and happens to like the geeky movies I like that no one my own age will see with me. And no, I'm not gonna clean my house (though I will have very good people clean it for me).
There are tradeoffs in life, and while couponing and shopping at thrift stores may seem incongruent with paying someone to clean your house (and often to do your laundry. Though I prefer to do my own laundry just because when you send it out they never do it right) -- while those things may seem incongruent, they're really not. At the end of the day, if you know where to find it, a coupon is a key that adds value to your purchase experience. As I get older and wiser, as I learn where to look, I'm discovering keys, both in the spiritual and in the physical realms, that add value to my life experience.
Headed out to get some lunch, came back, did some photo updates, and decided to finish last night's Vitamin Shoppe order. Recently lots of friends on FB have been couponing, and somewhere I heard someone say that when you're ordering you should just google the vendor. This appears to work better than Coupon Cabin, because Coupon Cabin now (like everything on the internet that used to be free) is so full of ads it's hardly worth the effort of visiting it (especially when your time is limited and your internet connection is closer to 1.5Mbps than the 5Mbps you're paying for). Vitamin Shoppe is already running a special for free shipping over $25.00. But I'm out of CoQ10, and the 200mg cap gets expensive ($0.33 per serving at VS, but I take 2-4 servings a day). I tend to buy in bulk, so it kicked the order up to over $100.00. It was about $117. I adjusted it a bit, but while I was adjusting it, I googled "vitamin shoppe coupon." I found a code for $25.00 off on an order of $150.00 or more. I actually needed more hyaluronic acid (helps with arthritic inflammation; also supposed to be good for skin), so by the time I added that and a small bottle of vitamin K, I just eked over the $150.00 mark. $153.30, to be exact. Which then brought my total down to $128.30. So the net-net is that I got a $17.00 bottle of hyaluronic acid for less than $10.00.
It's not a lot, but I try to only buy things I need, and to buy in bulk -- I usually buy vitamins twice a year, at Vitamin Shoppe's buy one, get one half off sale. For maintenance vitamins that I can't buy in bulk, I try to go to GNC during Gold Card week. I don't see the point in paying more if I can pay less, and if being frugal in small things allows me to save money so I can go on my trips (this is the second year I'll do TWO overseas trips. Pretty significant for someone who, during the dark years, couldn't scrape up enough extra money to get her passport renewed).
So yeah, I do couponing, and I shop in thrift stores, and I wait to buy things on sale. And I work three jobs. But I'ma climb Mt. Sinai, and I'ma jump out of an airplane, and I'ma do all the other things my heart desires. That's the tradeoff. No, I don't have a lot of time to spend hanging out, and no, I don't want to go out to dinner with you, and will only go to the movies with Amit because he's socially retarded and happens to like the geeky movies I like that no one my own age will see with me. And no, I'm not gonna clean my house (though I will have very good people clean it for me).
There are tradeoffs in life, and while couponing and shopping at thrift stores may seem incongruent with paying someone to clean your house (and often to do your laundry. Though I prefer to do my own laundry just because when you send it out they never do it right) -- while those things may seem incongruent, they're really not. At the end of the day, if you know where to find it, a coupon is a key that adds value to your purchase experience. As I get older and wiser, as I learn where to look, I'm discovering keys, both in the spiritual and in the physical realms, that add value to my life experience.
Thursday, June 2, 2011
Credit
Is great to have, but not if you need it. I think responsible stewardship means reducing one's debt as much as possible. Also, I'm cheap -- it just kills me that, to pay for something with a credit card (especially to do it "on time," by making monthly payments) ultimately results in spending much, much more than the item is worth. This hit hard when I was in CR -- I couldn't even pay for a hotel room with a credit card. OK, I could have, but they charge a 13.5% fee for using a credit card. When you think about it, it's less than the 18+% hotel tax they charge in the US, but since I had the cash in CR, I just paid cash.
So on that trip, crappy Spirit airlines was having some sort of promotional where you get a card, make a purchase, and then get 15,000 free points, enough for 3 free trips on Spirit. So I applied because I like free stuff.
Got the card today. It's offered through BankAmerica. Because I already have one card with BankAmerica, they basically didn't extend me any new credit, just reduced the credit line on the existing card and gave it to me on the new card. Since the credit line is sufficient, and the balance, even with the reduction, is less than 25% of the available credit, it shouldn't significantly impact my credit score. But the new card has a higher interest rate.
So I called to activate the card. And they're asking me how I like it, blah, blah, blah. I tell them about Spirit losing my bag and I tell them how much it sucks that they reduced my credit limit on a lower rate card and gave me the credit on a higher rate card.
So they lowered my interest rate to 2.99%. Yeah, it's only on purchases for a couple of months and on balances until the end of the year, but that's long enough for me to charge and pay for my gym membership. Which means I can pay for my membership at less than 3% interest. Not bad.
Of course, they're sending me a rewards card, which will likely have a higher interest rate than the card I have, but since I no longer use my B of A card, it's not a tremendously big deal. I understand the credit card companies are attempting to make money by raising interest rates and fees, but in my case, they're losing money. I am making slow but steady headway into paying off my credit card debt, thanks be to God.
But yeah. The credit card company lowered my interest rate For a minute. Yay them. For a minute.
So on that trip, crappy Spirit airlines was having some sort of promotional where you get a card, make a purchase, and then get 15,000 free points, enough for 3 free trips on Spirit. So I applied because I like free stuff.
Got the card today. It's offered through BankAmerica. Because I already have one card with BankAmerica, they basically didn't extend me any new credit, just reduced the credit line on the existing card and gave it to me on the new card. Since the credit line is sufficient, and the balance, even with the reduction, is less than 25% of the available credit, it shouldn't significantly impact my credit score. But the new card has a higher interest rate.
So I called to activate the card. And they're asking me how I like it, blah, blah, blah. I tell them about Spirit losing my bag and I tell them how much it sucks that they reduced my credit limit on a lower rate card and gave me the credit on a higher rate card.
So they lowered my interest rate to 2.99%. Yeah, it's only on purchases for a couple of months and on balances until the end of the year, but that's long enough for me to charge and pay for my gym membership. Which means I can pay for my membership at less than 3% interest. Not bad.
Of course, they're sending me a rewards card, which will likely have a higher interest rate than the card I have, but since I no longer use my B of A card, it's not a tremendously big deal. I understand the credit card companies are attempting to make money by raising interest rates and fees, but in my case, they're losing money. I am making slow but steady headway into paying off my credit card debt, thanks be to God.
But yeah. The credit card company lowered my interest rate For a minute. Yay them. For a minute.