Keep Watch

So my liver enzymes had been acting all crazy, and because I’m a cancer survivor and get my healthcare on the Upper East Side of Manhattan, my doctors tend to overreact. Which is cool; that’s why I go to doctors on the Upper East Side of Manhattan – that’s where the old money is, and in my brain, that translates to where the best healthcare is.  That does not mean that the best doctors are where the money is, but it does mean that when there’s old money in a community, you will find doctors who make enough to invest in support staff who aren’t always angry, and who at least act like they give a hoot about you.  You also find that they can charge enough that their offices aren’t like cattle drives (some have computers you can use while you wait; some offer food; most have free coffee, even if you just drop in to visit), and they can usually afford good diagnostic equipment.  With doctors, like everything else, you have to keep watch over the process.

Anyway.  I went to my liver specialist.  That’s the other thing about the UES, and about US healthcare in general:  everybody’s a specialist. I have a surgeon, an oncologist, an orthopedist, a podiatrist, a cardiologist, and a cardiac arrhythmia specialist (well, I used to.  Last time I saw him, he said that if all his patients were like me, he’d have to become a baker or something J).  Oh, and one other guy who’s like an endocrinologist or something, but he’s just too strange so I don’t go to him any more.  Brilliant guy, but really strange. 

But I was saying that I’d gone to my liver specialist, because these liver enzymes were acting up and I guess because I’ve had cancer, they all want to do these tests to see if I have these rare diseases.  As a matter of fact, I have to go have my skull X-rayed to see if I have Paget’s disease, and then have an ultrasound of my abdomen to see if I have a tumor or lesion or cancer on my liver.  I’m assuming the tests will be negative and that this is all medical CYA, but since I have Blue Cross and all that stuff is covered, and since I’ve been putting it off for about a year, I’m gonna get it done this weekend.

While I was at my liver specialist, I had him draw my bloods.  Even when I used to eat fried foods on a regular basis, my cholesterol wasn’t past the high end of normal, although my triglycerides were.  But I went vegan for Lent, and while I haven’t remained completely vegan, I happen to like the lifestyle.  I take cream in my coffee every morning; other than that, I make my best effort to avoid all animal products  (although I am thinking about beginning to eat honey; I’m going to experiment with a daily dose of honey and cinnamon to see if it impacts my arthritis). So I got my bloods done last week, and even though they were looking at liver enzymes, I asked him to do a lipid panel.  Turns out my liver doctor also favors a plant-based diet, and when I told him why I wanted it, he was totally happy to oblige.  The net result is that both my cholesterol and my triglycerides are OFF THE CHARTS LOW.  Mysteriously, while my liver enzymes still appear a bit high, the levels have significantly decreased since my last blood tests.  In my mind, this is just further indication that I don’t need to be eating a lot of meat.  But I’ll leave the analysis and diagnosis to the doctors.  I’m just keeping watch over them.  I firmly believe that, while doctors are available to assist me, God has given me stewardship over this body, and it’s my responsibility to take care of it and sort of have a clue as to what goes on with it.  So I keep watch, as best I can.

My auntie was talking to me the other day about all the stuff that’s going on:  Sandy Hook, the Boston Bombers, the Government’s ineptitude at handling gun control… she wondered what I thought about conspiracies. 

To be honest, I do think there’s something going on, and while conspiracies may be involved, I don’t think they are the root.  This is despite the fact that the Mayor of Boston has just called the bomber guys “actors.”  It’s bigger than them, though.  If we look at our natural disasters (Superstorm Sandy, the Great Plains blizzard, the tornado in Mississippi) and look at our human tragedies mentioned above, along with the elected officials who prefer to unite against a president of color than to unite for the good of all – when you look at all that, it’s easy to get all eschatological and think that we are living in the last days.

While that may be true, I don’t choose to believe that.  The main reason I don’t believe that is because of how I read the Revelation of John, as an allegorical text and not a literal one; but I do choose to accept the Bible literally when it says that no one shall know the day nor the hour.  Why do I read Revelation allegorically and take the Gospel as Gospel?  Because Revelation was a vision, which by nature is mystical and needs to be explained (and there’s a whole political undercurrent that suggests John was speaking against political powers but had to disguise his references in the symbols in Revelation), but the GOSPEL is a record of the words of Jesus the Christ, AND this particular passage occurs in more than one place.

 
And if you look at it, it tells us that, despite all sorts of signs and all sorts of stuff going on, and people claiming the Messiah has come, that no one will know until He actually comes.  The Word also tells us to Keep Watch, and that’s what I think is key here.

I think it’s key to watch how the enemy harnesses natural powers and human powers and uses them for destruction.  Think of how many unfortunate people are suffering crises of faith because of the aftereffects of any of the events mentioned above.  That crisis of faith becomes a victory for the enemy.  I spend entirely too much time looking at stories about humans who have shorts in their wiring – mass murderers, psychopaths, and the like.  With many of them, both alienation and desensitization are key aspects of their abilities to commit atrocities and continue to live.

And then I think about how we are all constantly being alienated and desensitized.  When there’s a natural or man-made disaster on the news every night, our responses to it are not as genuine, not as intense.  Sure, occasionally America’s heartstrings are plucked when a bunch of white people get massacred, as at Sandy Hook and as was attempted at the Boston Marathon.  But over 440 school-aged children were shot in Chicago in 2012.  Only 60 were killed, but Chicago is only one city.  I know that in the South Bronx neighborhood where I work, two or three toddlers were killed during 2012.  The outrage was local, but isn’t the life of every child valuable?  Why doesn’t the senseless killing of a toddler in the South Bronx or a first-grader in Manhattan evoke the same sadness and outrage as the killings of dozens of first graders in New England? 

Why?  Because we as a nation have become desensitized to violence in inner cities, in large urban areas, and in communities of color.  When kids get killed there, it’s considered “par for the course,” but if they get killed in the suburbs, that’s somehow more tragic.  The fact that we, as a nation, appear to value the lives of some children more than others (or to consider the deaths of some more tragic than that of others) is a symptom of our desensitization. When we are desensitized, we don’t see things as clearly; we don’t keep watch.

The fact that we are so tied to our electronic devices (says the lady who regularly walks with a smartphone, a laptop, a mini-tablet and a laptop/tablet hybrid) – is a symptom of our alienation.  When’s the last time you went out to dinner with someone without wondering about your cellphone?  How difficult is it to have a conversation with people without being interrupted by cellphones?  How many times have you waited for a service person to finish an obviously personal cellphone call?  Why is it that “Please Turn Off Cellphones” or “No Cellphones Allowed” are no longer custom-made signs for doctors, but are readily available at your local office supply store? 

 

So I think there’s a conspiracy by the prince of this world.  That conspiracy plays out in a collective alienation of us one from the other, and in a mass desensitization.  As we are alienated one from another, we forget how much we need each other, that we are not completely autonomous, but that, as an interconnected Body of Christ, as an interconnected Human Race, we are (or have the potential to be) greater than the sum of our parts.  As we are desensitized, our tolerance for violence grows.  Look at the violence that occurs when we kill animals for food.  Look at the violence we visit upon those whom we consider “other.”  As much as we claim to be civilized, let someone cross us or espouse a viewpoint different than ours, and we are ready to visit violence (often thinly veiled as “the wrath of God”) upon then.

Keep Watch.  Where is Jesus in the midst of all this? Where is the love? Where is the compassion?  Where is the loving of your enemies, the praying for those who persecute you and who despitefully use you?  As much as we speak about being a Christian nation and having Christian values, it doesn’t seem that those values come out in the way we treat each other; they’re only apparent in the rewards we seek from God in the life to come.  How infantile is that?

…or how deceptive?  Keep Watch.